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| The brainless wonder, how we love her! |
I am having a bit of a rest after being an intrepid living room explorer (more about that later). Even though I only whispered to DD about my back not hurting, it clearly heard me. I, as always, thought "yay, no pain. Time to clean the house for all I am worth". I see you shaking your head, reader. I hear you tut tutting, but no, I will never learn. I do have a shiny, clean, beautiful living room out of it though.
During my short sabbatical I am listening to The Tinyholding going on around me. I can hear DD, chatting on the blower to a client. Little tweets making their musical selves known as they flood into his machine via tweetdeck. (How long until they gets old? Ooh about five minutes ago I should think)
The high pitched whine of the essential life machine cleaning daily grind out of the laundry.
The occasional shuffle of a Teen Beast hard wired into his gaming essentials.
Best of all, and certainly most entertaining, is listening to Nesty Boglin "Training" the Uber Ginge that is Porge(Georgie aka Georgianna aka Chestnut Cherub aka Pooch).
Bless her, She is the sweetest beast (the dog that is) There is not a mean, snappy bone in her body. She love cuddles, people food, running and her ball. She fears cats, chickens, geckos, sprongy cat, boxes, sock puppets, any toy that makes a noise, and pretty much everything else. She has the IQ of a gnat. The memory of a goldfish and the learning ability of a log. In short, dear reader, she is thick. Lovable, but thick. Eager to please, but thick. Giving and eternally affectionate, but thick.
Frankly, I adore her!
As you can imagine from this description, she isn't the most trainable of dogs. I consider it a boon that she knows sit, lay down and stay (not that she remembers them and which command is which) Due to this I do feel Nesty Boglin may be fighting a loosing battle.
Armed with a bag of "treats" ie cheese and dog biccies. She is attempting to lead the happy, yet dozy thicky through a home made agility course. Expecting her to keep her nose at the right level and complete said course in police dog style. Not stopping to investigate her own feet or the shadow she has just passed. She does not want her to walk backwards or sideways. She would like her to weave through the obstacles and not just knock them over to sniff them.
Just yesterday she put on such a performance.
SHOCK! She has, in fact taught her to SIT, LAY DOWN, ROLL OVER, BEG, REACH FOR THE STARS and BOW.
What poor Ms Boglin has, in the past, failed to take into account is the memory of the pooch in her new found genius. She did not factor in another person entering the room to watch. I sat down ready for the grand unveiling. Nesty Boglin grinning in anticipation of hers and Porge's great success. The starlight of their glittering future at dog shows, country shows, village fetes and, hell why not, even the West End, flashing before her eyes. She talked me through the whole show. Explained the principles behind each trick. Discussed the merits of her training methods. Then...
Drum roll please.....
Georgie decided she would much rather run around in circles, have her belly scratched and play the fool.
Poor Nesty, dreams of the West End dashed. She did manage to get some sort of performance out of her beloved Pooch. But best of all she was showered in love from the adoring Ginge.
It's a good job we don't have anything that needs herding on the tiny holding, eh?
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